The Word Neoist Makes Me Want To Drink By Ambika Subramaniam

M: You could…serve the wine.

L: But why serve the wine when you can drink the wine.

M: If someone serves the wine then we need someone to not serve the wine?

L: We can both serve the wine.

M: It is the most important part of tonight… Whose opening is it anyway?

L: Karen Eliot, some artist of the Neoist movement who got famous through that writer Stewart Home.

M: The word Neoist makes me want to drink.

L: So does this exhibition in general. She was the hottest thing to hit Flipper gallery in a long time – that is, according to Home’s Slow Death.

M: Probably because of the open bar. People can say it was to pay homage to her genius, but it’s really for the house red and white.

L: The slow death of the exhibition and alcohol to aid its ruination.

M: My question is why drink just red or white when you can have a wine in one hand and the beer in the other?

L: Double fisting at an art opening? That’s pretty genius.

M: But double fisting has already been done in this elite gallery system.

L: I guess Flipper promoted DF at their last successful opening.

M: Maybe we should go past red and white…

L: Jungle Juice perhaps? Recipe?

M: Well the traditional American drink consists of: Everclear, Vodka, Peach Schnapps, Rum, Apple Schnapps, Sprite, Sunny D, Triple Sec, Gin, Sour Apple Schnapps, Red Wine, Hawaiian Punch, Orange Juice Concentrate

L: Sugar-stimulated double fisting!

M: And now we will have red, white, beer, and jungle juice…the New Opening of the Karen Eliot retrospective!

L: And a success at that!

M: Let’s drink to profits!


*Slow Death, by Stewart Home – “where sexual violence and violent sex plus skinheads attack the art world”

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